Shit, I had to add this as well. Some guy transforms a house into an insane Star Trek-esque palace! If you want it, it’s for sale on eBay for the low price of $1,000,000. Not bad!
Wow, I just logged into my blog here, and they’ve made some improvements. Let me do a quick experiment.
Text text text TEXT TEXT TEXT TEXT TEXT TEXT TEXT TEXT TEXT
Okay, now that that’s done, let’s move on.
Last night I did nothing but lay around on the couch getting fat. I mean NOTHING. I smoked, drank beer, ordered pizza and watched my gut grow. John and I watched some really awful TV. That, perhaps, is the most horrendous aspect. There was nothing good on from the moment I got home until 11:00, yet we stayed glued to the tube. I think I expelled a good deal of laziness from my system though.
Bush decided he would skip the NAACP convention this week, but it afforded Kerry a chance to shine up his image a bit. I love the White House rationale behind not showing up:
(lets use those sweet-ass bullets again)
Ah, but they did retaliate with a few good comments:
Although he addressed the group as a candidate in 2000, Bush is the first president not to speak to its convention since the 1930s.
So far the mainstream media has yet to do anything major about this, but there is supposedly video evidence that soldiers sodomized young Iraqi boys held captive in Iraq. When this hits the news, I expect that the number of folks supporting the decision to go to Iraq will shrink even more. Amazed as I am about how many people support it, I haven’t been blind to the fact that it takes something like this to change people’s minds. As if the abuse wasn’t sick enough already! You know, Bush can claim these people are criminals and they don’t represent Americans all he wants, but all it takes is a few bad seeds and the few Iraqis that still trust us will flop over to the insurgency. How can you blame them? Imagine if Iraqis were here and we found out they were engaged in that sort of thing! This story has been circulating for about two days now, and I’m keeping an eye on the major news sources, but so far there’s no mention of it. I can’t imagine it will remain a secret for too much longer.
As usual, I saved the best for last. NASA’s kickass X-43 hypersonic scramjet will push ahead to Mach 10 in it’s next test! Fucking incredible! That’s 7,500 mph, or around two miles per second.
The show last night went pretty well. There was major confusion when we first arrived, though. First off, there was no cover charge, which was fine, except everyone we told probably thought it’d cost $5 to get in or something! Then we were informed that Heavy Metal Karaoke would still be going on, most likely between acts. It all worked out in the end though. We got enough time, and we played pretty well except for the last song. Our newest song, Unicorn, was played flawlessly… so that’s good.
Despite yesterday’s defeat, Bush vows he will ban gay marriage somehow. Ain’t that sweet. See, what’d I tell you about disagreeing with him?
In the end, even if a majority vote for Kerry, they will be disagreeing with Bush, and because the same geniuses who helped him steal the 2000 election are having a fancy dinner with the electronic voter machine people, he will win anyway.
I guess not all rich people are pro-Bush afterall. Donald Trump has been slamming Bush regarding the war on Iraq, and doing a mighty fine job of it I might add. Thanks for your two cents, Mr. Toupee - er, I mean, Mr. Trump.
Unfortunately, when Whoopi Goldberg makes a remark about Bush, SlimFast drops her as their spokesperson. Actually, I totally don’t care about this, but Whoopi, thanks for whatever it is you said that insulted Bush in any way.
This is some good readin’ here, boy. Here are some of the FOX News memos that blatantly illustrate their tremendous neocon bias. The president is doing something that few of his predecessors dared undertake: putting the US case for mideast peace to an Arab summit. It’s a distinctly skeptical crowd that Bush faces. His political courage and tactical cunning are worth noting in our reporting through the day. Sick, sick, sick. There’s plenty more where that came from.
What kinds of things are changing because of the Patriot Act? Don’t be afraid… click it.
Every once in a great while, I enjoy a cigarette while taking a shit. Everyone does, right? Even you non-smokers. Don’t lie. Anyway, a man from West Virginia can now tell you that there’s a time for smoking while shitting, and there’s a time to wait it out. He fucking blew up a portable toilet!
Story of the century! Doctors grow replacement penis on 16-year old boy’s arm! With photo!
HA! HA! HA! Did I also mention HA?!
That’s right Bushie-poo, your ridiculous gay marriage ban idea was shot down today! In (the mildest form of) celebration, I linked to Gay.com instead of some other news source. While you’re there, I highly recommend you cast your vote for Mr. Gay 2004. I personally voted for mikallangelo, who is definitely too pretty for me to vote for, but since he likes Neil Diamond, and he doesn’t look like a jerk, gets my vote.
Judges from all levels of the judicial system, I hope you start deeming same-sex marriages appropriate all over the damn place. I want to walk down the street and see neoconservative heads turning red and exploding from rage! I want to see animated billboards of Bush having anal sex with Cheney! (Well, with the unmentionables blocked from view.)
I’m especially glad to hear this because last night I happened to catch a republican senator filibustering about this proposed amendment. It proved to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that these guys are only interested in discriminating against something they’re afraid of, instead of trying to “preserve the sanctity of marriage.”
So for all the republican senators and representatives out there, what better way to come to grips with this ruling than to go out and SUCK SOME DICK!? (No I won’t capitalize anything having to do with a republican.)
You know what I find intriguing? The fact that every time a negative assessment of policies, tax cuts, reforms or anything Bush is responsible for is released to the public, he ALWAYS claims that it’s an incorrect conclusion or a misleading result. Why can’t he admit that he is capable of mistakes? I seriously could not track down one example of a time when he took the advice of anyone! (Except Rice, Cheney, Rumsfeld…) What’s the use of having all these brilliant scientists and amazing financial geniuses around if each time they disagree with Bush, they’re “wrong”? Why are they wrong? Not because they’re findings are wrong, but because they disagreed with Bush. More appropriately, they misunderestimated him.
Bush, do you really think you’re smarter than all those scientists, accountants, or researchers of any kind? I’ll let you in on a little secret. My DOG could teach you a number of things, save these guys. Not only are they far more intelligent than you, they often have a lifetime of experience in dealing with just that one subject. You have a lifetime of failures, cocaine & booze, and getting what you want because your daddy is rich. I know it’s hard to accept that you’ve made a mistake, but for fuck’s sake, listen to those people!
I just got a junk e-mail message with the subject ‘Drunk Man Rapes Little Frog!’
So, I guess if you’re into that sort of thing, I know a guy.
While I will stick by my Bush dictatorship prediction, now ‘experts’ are saying that it is unlikley that elections will be postponed, even in the event of a terror attack. They also mention in this article that Congress could postpone a federal election, but only by passing a law to do so, while the Bush administration has no legal authority to act on its own. That’s good news, but um… I don’t think Bush really cares about, you know, laws and stuff.
It seems Bill O’Reilly is now a well known liar. So, Al Franken was right, you are a “lying liar.” My favorite one of the three is where he claims that Canada, France and Germany are all taxed at around 80 percent, in order to provide such successful social services. In truth, France had the highest percentage: 44.2%! Try again, fuckface. It’s not just taxes, it’s not just liberals gone wild… it’s called SHARING THE WEALTH.
Ralph Nader talks about tort reform. Sometimes it seems the neocons are just checking off their syllabus for total corporate domination. What is encompassed in this particular item? Since it was founded, our nation’s legislature has never attempted to federally tie the hands of judges and juries in the manner advocated by business interests today. The reason we are seeing tort deformers push the myriad pieces of legislation that would immunize doctors from malpractice responsibility; that would protect oil companies from cleaning up polluting components of gasoline from our drinking water sources; or that would makemore onerous the ability of class actions to succeed against wealthy cigarette manufacturers, asbestos manufacturers and other corporations, is because they need only establish a few federal legislative precedents to open the tort deform floodgates. You go, Ralph.
Now onto the REALLY important matters.
A Case Western student bites a hamster’s head and leg off! Someone find the website with the pictures. You can just describe it to me though… I don’t think I can watch that.
Nor could I watch dog-killing Kangaroos invading the suburbs of Australia! This is some hardcore shit. “My friend started shouting: ‘There’s a kangaroo in the pond. It’s got Summer’. It was surreal, like your worst nightmare,” … “She was screaming and screaming. The kangaroo just stared back at us. I will never forget that.” The kangaroo was trying to say “America is next, bitches.”
While we’re on the topic of animals, how about some Orca Porn?! Jesus tap dancing Christ. This is really sick, but … you’ll want to see it. It might make a nice desktop background.
People riding the Top Thrill Dragster at Cedar Point were hit with shards of metal while going 120 mph. I’ve seen this death wish of a ride in person, and it was scary to watch even when operating properly. It’s also been closed probably 3 times as much as it’s been open.
I don’t think paparazi should waste their time following Britney Spears to the beach, but I just noticed she TOTALLY has mankles. Look at those lunker man-calves!
Yesterday I saw Spiderman 2 at the Ultra-hyper-megaplex in the valley. It wasn’t bad! There was plenty of action in this movie, and a more interesting villain as well. It was also better than the first one without a doubt. I would have seen Anchorman, but we all know that’ll be on HBO in a couple of months, so fuck it.
A Senate report finds that not only were there ‘no dots to connect’, but the non-credible yet pro-war intelligence was taken into consideration while all other signs said the case for war was being exaggerated. It is so painfully obvious that we were taken for a ride that I STILL cannot believe there are Bush supporters out there! After months of being witness to countless examples of “indifferent American ignorance”, I am freshly astounded by continual support for the Bush administration. At this point, major chunks of our government, conservative and liberal alike, are awakening to the damage Bush is inflicting upon us all. Why aren’t average citizens taking note?
Oh, that’s right, the media. I believe I’ve already mentioned this here recently, but there is a scathing documentary on Rubert Murdoch and FOX News coming out, thanks to Robert Greenwald, a veteran Hollywood filmmaker. Outfoxed is the name of this film, and it apparently works to expose the blatant, even ORDERED move to the right. That’s right, memos were given out regarding stances to be taken on issues and stories. I’d say that influences people. Maybe only SOME people, but still.
When media corruption, fear tactics and being in bed with corporations doesn’t serve to clean up your image any more, you can always destroy the evidence. The Pentagon is saying that Bush’s military records have been destroyed. Microfilm containing the pertinent payroll records for the Texas-based Air National Guard had been damaged and could not be salvaged, it said. Oh yeah, I’ll believe that. Suuuuuuuuure. Like I really expect Bush to hold a press conference and divulge the truth; that he was snorting coke and boozing it up instead of serving his country. Yeah, that falls right in line with his character.
Perhaps because Bush knows that the shit’s going to hit the fan sometime before the election, the government is now looking at the possibility of rescheduling the election! The real reason is the widely publicized ‘terror threat’, which they seem to believe will be soooo catastrophic, yet cannot reveal any details of. Even in this article, they mention there will be countless conspiracy theories surrounding the election, especially in light of these new intentions. Here’s one that is, in my opinion, so realistic that it shouldn’t even be considered as a conspiracy:
Step 1: Between September and November, someone finds and captures Osama. “The October Surprise”
Step 2: Election Day, some type of terror strike occurs… perhaps something insignificant.
Step 3: Because Bush is the incumbant, he orders the elections delayed, and then begins usurping even more unauthorized power.
Step 4: Bush Dictatorship.
It’s that simple.
The world’s biggest AIDS conference opened in Bangkok today, with bitter allegations about the influence of religious fundamentalism on the Bush administration’s disease prevention policies. Add this situation to the list of things Bush fucked up.
Finally, some good news. Weed gives you awesome night-vision! I am not joking … there have been loads of situations where I could see just fine, and people around me were reaching out, bumping into eachother, and saying “I can’t see a thing!” Now, I might just have better night-vision, but … perhaps it’s the ganja.
Oh my god, I am indulging in the biggest heap of free food I’ve yet to see here at work. We’re talkin’ burgers, dogs, slaw, potato salad, cheese potatoes, deli trays, pasta salad, and a whole desert table I probably won’t even have room for. I had to get out of line because my plate was full! Sheeeesh. (Just got round two!)
Bush demands Bin Laden’s capture before election. I suppose this disproves the theory that he’s already been captured, but talk about a whiny little baby! Not only did he demand his capture, but he demanded that Pakistan do it for us. Good luck, you pathetic wuss-ass.
Though the world court ordered Israel to take down the wall, they say they won’t comply. You guys sure know how to piss people off!
Cassini is taking some cool Saturn photos.
A lion is currently wandering around near Columbus, Ohio! Holy shit! I want pictures.
Oh! I almost forgot! I found a website that has an ‘anagram generator’ on it. Here are some I came up with for my full name:
Matador Ugly Shins
Orgy Shuns Matilda
Mighty Sour Sandal
Adam’s Lung History
Surly Asthma Dingo
Adrian’s Ugly Moths
Solid Mung Ashtray
Holy Stamina Drugs
Mushy Gold Sinatra
Ghostly Asian Drum
Lamar Dings Youths
This Drug Anomaly
Ramona Sludgy Shit
Dinghy Loss Trauma
Sunday Logarithms
Gnarly Ham Studios
Mohair Glans Study
Godly Human’s Sitar
Hauls Dirty Mangos
and .. maybe the best one… Salty Hindu Orgasm
Here’s a few of Nick’s first and last name:
Dormancy Ink
YMCA No Drink
Narc On My Kid
Cry, Damn, Oink
Darn NYC, I’m OK
My Dick Ran On
Nick = Mod Ryan
Nay on Mr. Dick
My little brother’s first and last name:
Hash Mitten
Mint Sheath
Anthem Shit
(and his full name)
Earth’s Thin Hymen
Finally, the best of my dad’s full name:
Deluxe Thailand Orgasms
Random Asexual Delights
Against Exhumed Dollars
Damned Gorilla’s Exhaust
Garnish Tuxedoed Llamas
Give it a try! Email me your best ones!
