Sorry folks, blogger was giving me an error ALL day today. I have some links stored up, so tomorrow might be a “double issue”. Hope everyone east of the Mississippi is enjoying this humidity as much as I am.
Anyone remember this old game Ski Free? I know I played the shit out of it, back in the day. (It still pretty much sucks.)
Underwear that keeps your farts from smelling? It had to happen sometime.
Alright folks, party’s over. Put down the ribs, and finish your beer. Back to work.
More than 60 prisoners at Guantanamo Bay were under 18 when they were captured. Some are thought to have been as young as 14! One of the prisoners was living in Saudia Arabia at the ripe old age of 12 when he was accused of involvement in a London terror plot. So, with every nation and Bush himself calling for it to be closed… what’s keeping it open? Record sales of underground torture videos? Rumsfeld’s addiction to whipping people? The contract with Post to make “Gitmo Cereal”??
The US demanded extensive information on all international passengers, and the EU said no. Although I didn’t see it mentioned in this article, I heard on the radio that they even wanted to gather meal request information - thought to be used as an indicator of religion. Come on now.
In the Iraqi city of Haditha, it appears that a group of Marines slaughtered at least 24 civilians. A roadside bomb had just killed one of their own, and the Marines supposedly “snapped”. A cover-up has since been discovered, and members of Congress have been told to brace for the fallout once the details begin to emerge.
Most people probably never expected to hear an answer for the age-old question: “Which came first, the chicken, or the egg?” Well - a trio of English folks set out to solve the problem, and found that there is an answer. The egg. Naturally, many people take umbrage to the conclusion. Though, when you think about it, whatever evolved into chickens must’ve laid an egg that closely resembled a chicken, and as they say in the article - genetic material does not change during the animal’s life. So next time you hear someone quote the open-ended question, why not be that smarmy asshole that quickly responds “the egg”?
A videogame created for use by the US Army features a mission to overthrow a “Venezuelan tyrant”. You can’t blame Chavez for thinking it’s about him - however, I wouldn’t quite go along with his supporters in saying that the game is designed to “drum up support for a real invasion”. We’re a little busy with this Iraq thing, Hugo. Way to stay vigilant, though.
Oh Pat Robertson, what won’t you say? The legendary shit-talker claims he leg pressed 2,000 pounds. There’s even a video that supposedly shows him pressing over 1,000 lbs, but I haven’t watched it yet. I’ve been looking for the world record for leg press with no luck, but I did find this guy’s page where he claims to have a personal best of 1,500 lbs. The same guy also benched 800 lbs. You do the math.
Here are the declassified UK UFO records.
Texas has raised the speed limit on certain roads to 80mph, making this the first cool thing I have ever heard about the Lone Star state.
A dude (that went to BHS, apparently) was caught yankin’ his chain IN THE BEREA LIBRARY, and of course Carl Monday tracked him down and informed him that a security camera captured the whole thing. Freakin’ classic. The Boghoggler recounted the story over the weekend, and now the video is all over the place.
Mugshots where people smiled (or struck some kind of pose).
not that any of us needed “scientific” evidence, but here’s some more good news.
As I drove in to work this morning, I was stunned to hear what I believe to be Bush’s first admission of a mistake during his presidency. He says he regrets saying “Bring it on,” and remarked “I learned some lessons about expressing myself maybe in a little more sophisticated manner.” Wow. Now if he just understood what ’sophisticated’ meant, we’d be on the road to success. Bush and Blair refused to lay out a timetable for troop withdrawl, as expected, citing… well, you know their reasons.
Researchers believe they’ve traced the origin of HIV to chimpanzees in Cameroon. The process wasn’t exactly easy, and involved collecting around 1300 samples of fresh chimp feces to examine. Analyzing the genetic makeup of the chimps, they were able to locate a group with nearly identical strains of the virus. One can only hope this will help to create a vaccine at some point, but that’s still a ways off.
Reggae legend Desmond Dekker dies of a heart attack at age 64. He had planned to tour into the fall of this year, even. Although he’s not nearly as popular as Bob Marley, he was a true reggae pioneer. RIP, Desmond.
In Kyrgyzstan, when it’s time for you to find a wife, one approach is to kindap her. This practice, which wasn’t allowed during the Soviet era, has seen a resurgence in recent years. It often involves a group of married women, many of whom were once kidnapped themselves, holding down the young bride-to-be for hours on end - or until she finally relents. In some cases, the bride will escape, refuse, or even commit suicide to avoid being married. Very strange.
Peter Hammond - composite photography. Some very cool pieces to check out.
SomethingAwful’s Photoshop Phriday this week: Video Games According to Grandma. I have been checking out the thread this came from all week, and there’s only a few really good ones, but hey - it’s been a while since I thought any of the topics were decent.
I think I neglected to adhere to my precedent of not passing along speculatory news articles. It’s one of my biggest pet peeves. Anyway, it’s now being reported that Bush and Blair are NOT expected to lay out any sort of timetable for troop withdrawl. Honestly, I was a little surprised to read that the other day, although I attributed the move to Bush’s historically low approval rating. And since he’s miscalculated every other move so far, I figured a withdrawl plan at this point fit right in. However, this is more like it. This is the blindfolded nitwit of a leader we’ve become accustomed to.
Last night, the Bot Abbas and I were discussing whether or not White House staff truly believed Stephen Colbert was a right-wing pundit when they hired him to appear at the Correspondent’s Dinner. I told him that a lot of folks theorized that must have been the case; especially given the reaction of the crowd. For those of you who haven’t seen the show, he’s quite obviously one of the harshest critics of this administration, although his ‘arguments’ are satirically derived from the Bill O’Reilly school of bigotry and short-sightedness. Well, it seems that the White House staff are not the only ones that fail to “get it” - Tom DeLay actually cited Colbert in a defense against his critics! It’s even on the freakin’ home page of www.defenddelay.com! So, while Bot and I both agreed that it was unlikely someone was that stupid, we also agreed that merely entertaining the idea kept it in the realm of possibility. Folks, I’m here to tell ya… they’re that stupid.
Jacobs Field getting a new name? Since Dick Jacobs sold the team to Larry Dolan, the name has remained because of an agreement. However, that agreement expires this year. While ‘Dolan Field’ sure as hell doesn’t have a nice ring to it, those in favor of keeping Jacobs Field as the name are really reaching for meaningful reasons to do so. Take this for example: “We’re just used to calling it ‘The Jake,” or this long winded one: “When I get off work, I want to go and watch a sports game and grab a pretzel and a beer and get away from corporate America, and when you have just everything plastered all over it, I feel like I’m back in the white collar world. It’s 7 o’clock, it’s my time. Let’s go to the Jake,” Dude… I really don’t follow. Are you trying to tell me that paying $8.50 for a beer is escaping corporate America?
Some are saying Windows Vista will face further delays, but executives at Microsoft claim otherwise. The new OS was originally going to be released in 2005, and is already delayed until January of 2007. I’m not sure what innovation Apple needs to dazzle consumers with next, but this seems like a prime time to do it.
A group called Yukon to Yellowstone (Y2Y) is proposing highway overpasses for animals. An interesting idea - although I wonder what would impel animals to follow that specific course, as opposed to wandering down to the road. It’s pretty obvious that deer and the like are not aware that highways are dangerous - just count the carcasses on the side of the road. I think they’re trying to lessen that effect through various means, one of which are fences along highways. Still, that’s an awful lot of fence.
Clarks shoes on sale at Amazon. I’ve got a pair of ‘em at home, and they’re really durable. I’m just sayin’.
I know probably no one but nicodemia will be interested in this, but here’s another article on cleaning up Telegraph. Some “city officials” say the neighborhood hasn’t kept pace with changing tastes. Other, more acute sources say there’s a bunch of shitty housing and destined-to-fail businesses with money to burn that are bringing it down.
My response to “If you were on a desert island and could only take one thing with you, what would it be?”
Provided I could start a fire, that is.
Well now. Today I have enough links for two days of blogging.
Israel’s new president Ehud Olmert visited Bush yesterday, and received his endorsement for unilaterally re-drawing Israel’s boundaries IF diplomatic attempts fail. Well, fellas, I’d say you’re on a road to failure given that you’ve refused to negotiate with the legitimately-elected Hamas government of Palestine. And as for Hamas, you guys might as well change your name to The Militant Islamic Movement Hamas (TMIMH), especially because that acronym has such a nice ring to it. Every single British or American news report prefaces “Hamas” with “militant”, so hey. Bush also said the US would defend Israel in case of an attack. Thanks for reiterating.
Speaking of attacks, Iran said any attacker would receive “an historic slap” from them. That Ahmadi-Nejad, he sure has a way with words.
Everyone on the Atlantic coast WATCH OUT! Tomorrow it is predicted that a giant tsunami will splash down, destroying everything in its path. This comes from a man who’s also an expert on UFOs. So, heed this gravely serious warning.
An Indonesian family has allegedly experienced bird flu passed from human to human. Is it time? Need I remind y’all once again, to get ready for some motherfucking bird flu? Maybe.
One company hopes to provide 95% of America with free wireless internet access. I just skimmed the article, but saw no projected date or timetable whatsoever. Probably a good call, coz I don’t see that happenin’.
Some astounding prison statistics. Here are some highlights:
1 in 12 black males between 25 and 29 are imprisoned.
1 in 136 Americans is behind bars!
The USA’s population is 4.6% of the world’s population, but our prison population is 23% of the world’s prison population.
Of course, this is largely attributed to the Grand Poobah of all failures, the War on Drugs. I need not elaborate.
I guess that leads to this next article, which is pretty surprising. People who smoke marijuana, even every day and over long periods of time, are not at an increased risk of contracting cancer. The study even included some folks who are estimated to have smoked 22,000 joints over their lifetime. Despite the higher amount of tar in marijuana versus cigarettes, scientists believe that the THC must be playing a role in reducing the cancer risk.
If you’re a poor teenager, you have a higher risk of becoming fat. I think that has something to do with Doritos not containing enough vitamins. I dunno.
Passengers Bravely Take Down Plane Showing Big Momma’s House 2.
Underwater hotel? How freakin’ awesome is that?
Now THIS is amazing. A picture that you can keep zooming into, forever. Yes, of course there are repeating images, but it’s still insanely cool.
Well, perhaps some of you will find this even more amazing. A chick who can crush beer cans with her boobs. I guess it’s a little less-surprising when you realize she’s somewhere around an L-cup.
